A 2025 Wedding Guest Survival Guide — From RSVP’ing and Gifting to Decoding the Dress Code

In her recurring column, “Social in Security,” modern etiquette ambassador and Bell’INVITO founder Heather Wiese walks us through a list of trusted tips you can rely on. Today’s topic: 2025 wedding guest survival.

The wedding is afoot, and whether it is a series of weekend soirées and brunch excursions or a simple, intimate fête, the reply, dress code, digital directives, plus-one politics, and wedding gift are the five elements of the proverbial social contract you cannot afford to overlook. My friend, it’s easier than you may think. Your guide to navigate today’s wedding landscape as a guest with grace and the social special sauce is right here.

Reply Like You Know

By now, you have likely replied. If you are catching this article beforehand, even better. Let me please stop you before you use a check mark on the reply card. Do this instead: write the number attending in the blank where it says their version of “accepts.” And if there is a person in your household not attending (only from those invited on the envelope), write the number who will not attend in the space provided for regrets. A detailed scoop on how to properly use a reply card enclosed in an invitation here: read reply card etiquette. For our purposes today, be sure you reply and give the names of those attending as addressed (invited) on the envelope. If entrées are listed, use initials next to the entrée selection for each guest.

The Dress Code Decoded

An elegant host will give straightforward attire instructions; however, new trends mean new decoding for the attire selection for each event. First and foremost, this isn’t prom, nor is it Las Vegas. Wedding attire leans toward elegant. Avoid an overt thirst trap look. Flatter your figure with the understated sophistication of quiet luxury, or opt for the chic “coastal grandmother” pieces over the bombshell cut-out or bodycon mini. Need some visual inspiration? Kate Middleton does it well, of course. Solid, predominantly white, and white-ish looks stay closeted. 

This year, think clean lines, quality fabrics (toss the unflattering knits and lightweight jerseys), neutral colors — think black, espresso, camel, beiges, navy, ocean blues, and natural soft greens and blushes. These are styles from any era that look and feel luxurious, not frumpy. If you’re not on a couture budget, Tuckernuck has a lovely assortment this season to get you the look, and Wolf and Badger is always a go-to for me, with an eye on emerging brands, a commitment to great quality, and ethical manufacturing. Flatter your figure but avoid clothing that is too tight. Invest in a tailor rather than a logo to boost your confidence. Carry an interesting bag if your look is simple, or a simple bag if your look has more flair. Balance is key.

Social Media Matters

In our hyper-connected world, it’s tempting to document every moment. However, many couples now request “unplugged” ceremonies, asking wedding guests to refrain from snapping photos or posting on social media. This allows everyone to be present and ensures professional photographers capture the moments without interference. It also ensures that flattering photos are released, and the hosts and guests of honor get a say in what is released and what is private. Always check the couple’s preferences — if they ask for device-free participation, honor their wishes and enjoy the experience. If the couple provides a hashtag, use it and feel free to post flattering pictures after the bride or groom makes the first post or tells you otherwise. 

What — and How to Gift

Digital registries have streamlined the gifting process, but they also introduce new considerations. Group gifts are increasingly popular, allowing guests to contribute to larger items or experiences the couple desires. Cash gifts remain acceptable, especially when given through secure platforms or accompanied by a heartfelt handwritten note as a keepsake. It is certainly still ok to bring a gift to the ceremony, however if you have gifted online through a registry, it’s also acceptable to arrive with just a card for the bride and groom.

Plus-One Etiquette: Understand the Invitation

Traditionally, married, engaged, or cohabiting couples receive joint invitations. Adult children who also live at home with their parents will traditionally receive their own invitation. These invitations are addressed to the invitees in the household explicitly. If children from the household are invited, their names are included on the envelope. If their names are not included, they are not invited. If your invitation doesn’t include a line inviting you to bring a guest, do not crash the party with your plus one. Respect the couple’s guest list decisions, which are often influenced by budget and venue constraints. If you’re uncertain, a polite inquiry is acceptable within about a week of when you received the invitation (not last-minute), but be prepared to attend alone if necessary, or to decline if you are uncomfortable attending solo. 

As weddings continue to evolve, we have the benefit of learning new trends, customs, cultures, and seeing which timeless techniques keep the social wheels turning smoothly. Stay informed, keep learning. Celebrations are ever-changing, and trends are the stuff of progress and privilege. Master these five things and stand secure in all your social interactions. Most importantly, relish the moments!